


if i had a choice, i'd be with you

by bothsexuals



Series: together/never [2]
Category: Community (TV)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Pre-Relationship, i think? yo someone tell me if these fics qualify as angst, you guessed it... YEARNING!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-05-22
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:40:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24318967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bothsexuals/pseuds/bothsexuals
Summary: Troy and Abed share a quiet  moment in the dark.
Relationships: Troy Barnes/Abed Nadir
Series: together/never [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1755643
Comments: 20
Kudos: 180





	if i had a choice, i'd be with you

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, more of this Troy has internalized homophobia and he's in love with Abed shit, because I was in the shower singing this song and I was like... oh... hold up... and then rushed to write this. Literally JUST wrote this. I hope you like it!
> 
> Title, once again, from "Together/Never" by Oberhofer. Thank you so much to Oberhofer for writing a buttload of perfect trobed lyrics.

Troy and Abed are laying in their blanket fort, surrounded by darkness, except for a faint light coming from the living room. They had watched a movie, then hadn’t felt like getting up and moving to their beds, so they had simply discarded Abed’s laptop and stayed on the cushions they were laying on, throwing a blanket over themselves. 

They’re both laying on their sides, facing each other. Troy can feel Abed’s eyes piercing through his closed eyelids, tries to resist opening them until he can’t anymore. He meets his best friend’s eyes in the dark and can’t help thinking that the soft golden hue on his face makes him look like something right out of a fairytale, angelic and magical and straight up gorgeous. 

They stare at each other, only inches apart, for what feels like an eternity, and Troy feels tears prick at his eyes. 

“I love you,” Abed suddenly says, his voice so low and intimate that it makes Troy shiver, “you know that, right?” 

Troy doesn’t reply. He can’t, can’t find his voice, can’t be sure he’s not dreaming, can’t let this happen because then everything would come crashing down on him and he would suffocate. 

He bites the inside of his cheek, tries to hold back the tears forming in his eyes. It doesn’t work- he realizes as much when Abed reaches over and catches a tear that’s running down his cheek with his thumb, dries it with a small caress. 

“I can’t”, Troy finally replies, the words coming out more as a sob than anything else. 

“Okay.” Abed accepts it easily, because of course he does, because he’s the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to Troy, and he loves him more than Troy could ever love himself.

Abed takes his hand off Troy’s face, and instead puts it on top of Troy’s, between them. Troy turns his hand over, lets Abed hold it for real. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispers brokenly. 

Abed tightens his grip on his hand for a second, and only then does Troy realize he had been trembling. 

“It’s okay,” Abed whispers back, his eyes staring so intensely into Troy’s that he feels like he might just burst into flames, “whenever you’re ready.” 

He loosens his grip on Troy’s hand, gives him an opening to end the contact. Troy doesn’t. He squeezes Abed’s hand tighter, instead. His heart jumps at the hopeful look on Abed’s face. 

He closes his eyes. He’s not ready, yet.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed that. If you did, please leave kudos and/or a comment, it makes my day!


End file.
